Thursday, January 20, 2011

Second-Guessing

Do you often make a decision, then question whether you made a good one? Do you dwell on regret, talk yourself into believing you made the right choice, or see if you can retrace your steps, undo them and decide differently?  Or do you waffle and see-saw for weeks before taking any action?

Though I'm thinking about major life choices like changing jobs, moving, or whether or not to stay in or start any kind of relationship from business to personal, I'll use the example of buying a new pair of glasses.

I didn't make a snap decision, but did my research. I visited a handful of shops among the myriads. Then I brought a friend to two places to help me choose. I must've tried on over a hundred pairs, from over the top funky to boring, in all price ranges.

I finally settled on a frame with my friend's and the opticianista's (that's what it says on her card) assistance and encouragement. Given my prescription, the thin lenses with no-scratch, UV coating, etc., cost quite a bit. In the moment, I thought I'd found what I was looking for. Mission accomplished!  And another item checked off my to do list.

But when I went to pick them up a week or so later, I wasn't quite as pleased. I wanted my new glasses to give the message: this person is creative, fun and interesting. The message I saw instead: weird and quirky, but not in a good way. I didn't think they were all that flattering, either...the tortoiseshell was darker than I remembered and makes me look a little Harry Potter-ish. But I hadn't gone to Lenscrafters, which offers a 90-day unconditional satisfaction guarantee (I bought my last pair there, though overall I found their frames a bit too traditional for my taste). I'm still investigating my limited options.

I'm going to focus on decisions I've made I know were and are good, not suffer too many regrets, and see if I can learn anything from this experience.

How do you resolve decisions you're not happy that you made?

More info:

5 Tips to Feel at Ease with Decisions

5 Ways to Stop Second-Guessing

How to Stop Second-Guessing Decisions

Break the Curse of Second-Guessing

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